Someone close to me is facing fearsome health problems and will shortly undergo exams to pinpoint the diagnosis and determine the treatment. Throughout all this she has been nothing less than courageous and, in fact, persists in being perky so much of the time that even those who know her may not grasp how serious her condition is.
After two or three hours of starting and trashing posts more typical for this blog, I realize now that such efforts are futile. Instead, I’m offering only a single song that I have found comforting at such times. Cry (if you want to) is written by Casey Scott and sung by Holly Cole. The lyrics are lovely but set to music they have an even greater impact. I’ve printed the lyrics after my comments. As it turns out, another blogger at This Woman’s Work has developed a mix tape with the theme of comfort, and one of the songs she has chosen is Cry (if you want to) so you can download that song from this page:
This Woman’s Work Comfort Mix
The above link is not operative; instead, use the player below.
Holly Cole - Cry (If You Want To)
I’ve listened to this song many, many times. I believe the special appeal of Cry (if you want to) is its acknowledgment, echoing the sentiments of Anjani’s Blue Alert in another context, that the connection between two people (which may be labeled caring or friendship or family ties or romance or empathy or numerous other names but is, as shrinks and poets learn if they are taught properly, most accurately known as love) is ultimately insufficient to rescue us from the human condition coupled with the knowledge that this terrifying fact is itself what lends dignity to making such an offer to that person; giving everything, knowing that, in the end, it can’t be enough, is what makes love precious and essential.
Cry (if you want to)
Cry if you want to
I won’t tell you not to
I won’t try to cheer you up
I’ll just be here if you want me
There’s no use in keeping a stiff upper lip
You can weep you can sleep you can loosen your grip
You can frown you can drown and go down with the ship
You can cry if you want you
Don’t ever apologize venting your pain
It’s something to me you don’t need to explain
I don’t need to know why I don’t think it’s insane
You can cry if you want to
The windows are closed the neighbors aren’t home
If it’s better with me then to do it alone
I’ll draw all the curtains and unplug the phone
You can cry if you want to
You can stare at the ceiling tear at your hair
Swallow your feelings and stagger and swear
You can show things and throw things and I wouldn’t care
You can cry if you want to
No I won’t make fun of you I won’t tell anyone
I won’t analyze what you do or you should have done
I won’t advise you to go and have fun
You can cry if you want to
when it’s empty and ugly and terribly sad
I can’t feel what you feel but I know it feels bad
I know that it’s real and it makes you so mad
You can cry
Cry if you want to
I won’t tell you not to
I won’t try to cheer you up
I’ll just be here if you want me to be near you
2 responses so far ↓
1 MindSpin // Sep 6, 2006 at 6:24 pm
You are heck of a guy.
2 Squirrely Jedi // Sep 6, 2006 at 10:45 pm
Thank you for posting this. There is someone in my life right now that needed to see this, and I didn’t know it until I read this today.