Even though it would imperil my standing in the misanthropic organizations, clubs, and societies to which I would belong – if misanthropes joined organizations, clubs, and societies –I would nonetheless have to confess, if, for example, I were interrogated during an especially odd sort of inquisition, that on several occasions, I have been the recipient of the favors of strangers, many of whom I’ve met on the internet.
Further, these were almost always strangers who had no obligation, either moral or commercial, to help me. And, nearly 100% of the time, these individuals provided assistance with no hope of compensation beyond expressions of gratitude and, in fact, rejected offers of payment.
Go figure.
I have several of these stories, each of which I treasure and recount to myself periodically, not only to produce that pleasant sense of gladitude1 but also to admonish myself that since I’ve made a number of withdrawals and more than a few unsecured loans from the Cosmic Bank of Favors, I had best take every opportunity to make a deposit.
Today’s parable falls short of miraculous and is, in fact, altogether routine and typical of the genre, which makes it all the more wonderful.
The Plight Of The Prodigal
While my older son, The Prodigal, was in full prodigal-hood as a semi-pro wastrel in Antigua, Guatemala, he disclosed to his paternal unit (that would be me) that the renewal of his tourist visa was – oh, let’s round it off at 300 days overdue.
This renewal process was, of course, far more complex than necessary, but, in compensation, was described in ambiguous, complicated, and contradictory terms in the official documents.2
Where Good Samaritans Hang Out These Days
The Guatemalan government turned out to be precisely as helpful as one would expect a bureaucracy, especially one that operates in a language and culture other than ones own, to be.
Naturally, in my quest for information, I went a-Googling in hopes of finding an explicated version of the official visa regulations. While that aspiration went unrequited, I did run across an unexpectedly clear explanation of the process written in the form of a complaint on the (and I couldn’t make this up) Black Flag Café forums, a site dedicated to those “living in dangerous places.”
Although the writer used a pseudonym and listed no e-mail address, he did mention the kind of work he did (software development), giving me enough clues to track him down – and, more importantly, deduce his work e-mail address – — by shuffling through his employer’s web site and determining the standard format they used for e-mail addresses. I sent a message asking for details about renewing visas. He wrote back, not only answering my questions but spontaneously offering the help of his sister, who ran a travel agency in Guatemala City. She, in fact, met with the Prodigal, gave him detailed instructions re what answers to give to the administrative questions he would be asked. She also gave him an airline ticket home (Guatemala required proof of capacity to get back home) to an flight which existed only on paper.
After lots of forms and a transfer of monies from my bank account to that of the Guatemalan government (which I consider a personal form of foreign aid), my progeny was in possession of a valid visa — primarily because some guy and his sister, who knew nothing about me or the Prodigal except that I had e-mailed him with a plea for help, provided far more assistance than I requested, volunteering for the job with only my appreciation as a reward.
God bless kind people and the internet.
Footnotes
- Oddly, “gladitude” doesn’t seem to be an accepted word in the English language or even in the Scrabble word lists. A Google search draws a blank as well. Yet, it seems a useful construct, denoting a “glad gratitude” as opposed to, say, a “solemn gratitude.” Who knows? Those OED-3 criteria for new words seem pretty lax. Maybe this can be selected in the same group as “bippy” and “hard-assed.”↩
- In case it’s a question on a game show, the Guatemalan immigration office requires a credit card and proof of income to renew ones visa every 90 days; alternatively, one can leave Guatemala for 24 hours and then return for another 90 days - of course, to legally leave the country, a visa is required. To renew the visa, one submits a photocopy of a credit card (front and back) or other proof of income along with 10 Queztales (About a $1.25) for each day the 90 day term of the visa has been overstayed. The Department of Immigration holds the applicant’s passport for the several days required to complete the renewal.↩
