Here's Looking At You, Lawanda1
This post is a casual commemoration of Lady Lawanda, who was the woman in my life for the past three years and who died from breast cancer six months ago.2
Lawanda Surprises Me – Again
This morning, my new, hot shot flash card developed a glitch, necessitating the use of an old card to take a set of photos. When I transferred the images from my camera to my computer, I discovered two extra photos on the card in addition to those I had just taken.
One of those photos is atop this post. That’s Lady Lawanda walking down a hallway in my home, looking back over her shoulder at me. I think. I don’t recall taking this picture. There is nothing mysterious about that; I just don’t remember it, perhaps because it is a poor photo. Well, actually, the only egregious flaws are the focus, the color, and the exposure. And the red-eye glare. And the blurriness. Otherwise, it’s a dandy.
Nonetheless, it’s my conviction that that there is something special about Lawanda that shines unattenuated through the photo’s rather impressive technical faults.
A similar phenomenon has taken place many times in the past when I unexpectedly stumbled across something that reminded me of Julie.3 It is a testimony to Lawanda’s character and empathy that she was supportive during these events rather than threatened by them.
A Year Ago
I do recall this photo taken on the deck of my mother’s home in the Ozarks overlooking Table Rock Lake. That’s me on the viewer’s left and Lawanda on the right.
I can’t think of anything else to add that isn’t even more embarrassingly transparent.
- I find it necessary to note that “Lady Lawanda” was the blogonym she chose. [↩]
- This post is also, secondarily, my apology for failing to publish any of the several posts I have in process that are based on information provided by others, thereby creating a degree of obligation on my part to use them in a timely manner. I can only murmur that I tried all day to work on a number of those compositions but got nowhere. The sun, I’ve heard, will come up tomorrow, and I’ll try again with the regular agenda. [↩]
- Julie Showalter was my fiercely intelligent, wickedly sexy, and much beloved wife with whom I had a outrageously wonderful 20 year marriage that ended with her death in late 1999 from cancer diagnosed the week of our wedding. She was also a prize-winning author. Many posts on this blog are about her, our unlikely romance, and our life together, and still others consist of her writings. Information can be found at Julie Showalter FAQ. [↩]
The sun WILL rise tomorrow, and, just the same, any writing will find its own time. Give yourself to Lawanda, Julie, your Mom and all you love, when things move you.
Sláinte mhaith!
Grace comes at unexpected moments. There is nothing more important in life than to love and be loved, unless it is to be reminded that it happened.
Listening to Hallelujah tonight, thought of you, ended up here with you and Lady Lawanda and Julie.
Hallelujah.