Leonard Cohen World Tour To End In 2011 – With Start Of Leonard Cohen Intergalactic Tour


First We Take Manhattan, Then We Take Alpha Centauri

After discovering the Leonard Cohen Intergalactic Tour poster (shown above)  in the Chicago Rosemont Theatre dressing room assigned to Cohen at last week’s concert, Heck Of A Guy Editor and Publisher, DrHGuy, unleashed this blog’s best agents to investigate.

That team of reporters has now ascertained that the recent announcement of the extension of the Leonard Cohen World Tour to exotic venues in France, Croatia, and Russia in 2010 is a deliberately designed distraction to avert attention from the final phases of surreptitious negotiations between NASA and Cohen’s management group to launch the Unified Heart Space Station in early 2011. That vessel will serve as a base for a Leonard Cohen concert tour that will roam indefinitely through the furthest reaches of space.


As shown above, the road crew is already at work preparing the specialized equipment needed for Cohen’s latest musical jaunt. Attached notes indicate that these technicians are making the necessary adjustments to assure that, in the zero gravity environment, an episode of overenthusiastic skipping does not result in Leonard Cohen spinning endlessly through the infinity of outer space.


Andromeda Galaxy – Fall 2011 Leg of Leonard Cohen Intergalactic Tour

The Preliminary Schedule

While details are sketchy, it appears that the first portion of the Tour will take place within the smaller, more intimate planets and moons of our own solar system where the performances can be honed before  playing the larger galaxies.

8 responses to “Leonard Cohen World Tour To End In 2011 – With Start Of Leonard Cohen Intergalactic Tour

  1. Thank you, this made my day! The poster alone made me (and as one might speculate maybe Leonard too ;)) laugh out loud.
    Although – after having accepted that the tour will most possibly be endless indeed, the proposition of taking outer space will not seem too far-fetched really. :)
    When will the pre-sales for the Moon start?

  2. I’m ready!

  3. I’m over the moon with this. Somehow, you always manage to find just the right way to say what I’ve been thinking; although I might consider attending a gig in another galaxy. Imagine the acoustics.

  4. Dr. Heck – this is wonderful news and what a glorious Tour Poster that is! You refer to “Attached notes.” I am not doubting that they are visible to you but I can’t see them. I can, however, see the attached chords in that picture – looks like the fourth, the fifth – the minor fall, the major lift?

    NOW – I cannot say that I am exactly surprised about all this. I have hesitated to mention this to anyone, but since you have broken this news, I will. I recently purchased Unified Hearts ring at the most excellent Philadelphia show (blessedly held at the Tower Theatre rather than the wretched Spectrum that is scheduled for implosion :) ). Quite by accident, I noticed that when I held that ring to my left ear (left ear only), I could hear “chatter.” Upon closer listening I swear it was alien chatter! BUT, in the background, I could hear Leonard Cohen singing!! New songs! Songs I had never heard before! Wonderful new songs! While this was not at all an unpleasant discovery, I, of course, found it a bit unsettling and I really starting wondering if I was “half crazy” (not necessarily a bad thing). However, then something else happened. Now – at that Chicago show you were blessed to attend, Leonard, with no announcement, sang “that other blues song” – a wonderful new gem of a song never heretofore played in public. Imagine my utter shock when I realized that this is one of the songs I had been listening to Leonard sing for exactly one week on my Unified Hearts ring!

    Since no one that I know of has reported anything similar with their rings, I am now suspecting that the extraordinary characteristics attached to my ring are connected with where it was purchased – in Philadelphia!! And I am thinking this is a good omen for me. Leonard and his wonderful troupe *will* be returning to Philadelphia! And this is further speculation on my part – but I am now wondering if perhaps NASA will be using the site vacated by the soon-to-be imploded Spectrum – to launch the United Heart Space Station. And, of course, the launch would be preceded by a most wonderfulsendoff show in Philadelphia (Academy of Music – or the Tower Theatre – the Kimmel Center – all wonderful venues).

    Speaking of rings, at first glance, I thought maybe that was a wedding ring showing on Leonard’s left hand in the magnificent Tour poster. But on closer examination – it looks like a ring on his middle finger. :) :)

  5. Resistance is futile!

    All of your cold and very lonely base are belong to Leonard!!!!1!!

  6. He definitely has The Right Stuff.

  7. The Hat inside the space helmet was an especially nice touch :)

  8. Are there any seats left?
    Is there Richard Branson involved?
    Beam me up, Leonard!

    Thank you -it’s too funny…Katja