The Tragedy – When Friends Can’t Dress Up For Halloween
How can one not be moved by photos like the one below in which Leonard Cohen’s young friend bravely pretends to enjoy spending Halloween at home with the Canadian singer-songwriter instead of going door to door dressed as a witch or a ghost or perhaps even one of Leonard’s angels? (click on images to enlarge) More realistically, as can be seen in this photo from the September 1994 Mojo article by John Walsh (which identifies her as Leonard’s “Romanian friend”), the poster child for this campaign is reduced to slouching resignedly on the one bed in the house and enduring the ignominy that is shag carpet.
Won’t you help? Together, we can costume these forsaken young
women and change their Halloween from a dirty trick to a real treat
Credit Due Department: The black and white photo under the poster graphic is from Ira Nadel’s “Various Positions.” The photo used in the poster was found by Rike.
The Heck Of A Guy Halloween Post Featuring Leonard Cohen
I’m turning tricks, I’m getting fixed, I’m back on Boogie Street.
From A Thousand Kisses Deep by Leonard Cohen [emphasis mine]
I want to thank you, Joan of Arc, for treating me so well.
From Last Year’s Man by Leonard Cohen [emphasis mine]
When the shopping days left until DrHGuy’s birthday dwindle down to a precious few,1 Heck Of A Guy traditionally offers readers a Halloween distraction to bind the anxiety generated by the anticipation of the November 1st double holiday: All Saints Day and DrHGuy’s natal celebration.2 If you’ve already purchased and wrapped your birthday gift, feel free to indulge in this year’s Heck Of A Guy Halloween Homage to Leonard Cohen.
Leonard Cohen-Inspired Costumes
Like a bird on the wire, like a drunk in a midnight choir I have tried in my way to be free. Like a worm on a hook, like a knight from some old fashioned book I have saved all my ribbons for thee.
Opening lines of Bird On The Wire by Leonard Cohen [emphasis mine]
While few have the technical skills to produce something like the inspired 2009 Halloween outfit seen above (found at Full. Body. Transplant), Cohen’s lyrics are a treasure trove of costume suggestions. The cowpoke below, for example, is the manifestation of The Ballad Of The Absent Mare. Heck, the figures described in the verses of Is This What You Wanted alone would populate a full-fledged Halloween party:
… You were Jesus Christ my Lord, I was the money lender. You were the sensitive woman, I was the very reverend Freud. You were the manual orgasm, I was the dirty little boy.
And is this what you wanted to live in a house that is haunted by the ghost of you and me?
… You were Marlon Brando, I was Steve McQueen. You were K.Y. Jelly, I was Vaseline. You were the father of modern medicine, I was Mr. Clean. You where the whore and the beast of Babylon, I was Rin Tin Tin.
Halloween jack-o’-lantern carved by Leonard Cohen, 1994. From LeonardCohenFiles
The Lost Leonard Cohen Album – Songs Of Love & Halloween
In 2008, Heck Of A Guy broke the the haunting tale of eerie corporate error known as Leonard Cohen’s Songs Of Love & Halloween.
Excerpt:
Disappointed with the sales of Leonard Cohen’s first two albums, Songs of Leonard Cohen and Songs From a Room, his record label demanded that he produce a novelty LP tied to Halloween to increase his commercial appeal. His protests that issuing an album in this genre would be incongruent with his style was countered by the corporation’s argument that “no one is buying the poet turned singer-songwriter shtick.” …
Leonard Cohen and his record company have consistently denied the existence of Songs of Love and Halloween, but to this day, those passing by a certain Montreal warehouse near the harbor after sunset on October 31st report hearing a low-pitched, gravelly voice singing – or wailing – about the woman who “… cut off my head on the unmade bed”
If you want a lover
I’ll do anything you ask me to
And if you want another kind of love
I’ll wear a mask for you
From I’m Your Man by Leonard Cohen
DrHGuy’s first Leonard Cohen Halloween post (Halloween 2007) offered “genuine, way cool, certified, high quality Heck of a Guy Halloween masks of Leonard Cohen, Phil Spector, and Anjani.
Today marks the addition of another Leonard Cohen mask to the Cohenite holiday wardrobe.
Instructions: The World Tour Leonard Cohen Mask
The brim of Cohen’s trademark fedora necessitates the use of two images.
Click on the links below and download both Mask 1 and Mask 2: Mask 1
Mask 2
Print both pages (preferably in color) on card stock paper
Cut out both images and cut out the eye slots in both faces
Match up the images with Mask 2 on top and glue them together
Attach a handle (while a Popsicle stick is the traditional implement, a pencil, tongue depressor, and many other household items will work; DrHGuy has found a spatula makes an ideal handle)
And the final product looks like the image atop this post – if you have Paul Newman eyes.
The Heck Of A Guy Alternative Costume
The Duchess Of Durham – who may not have noticed the fine print in her wedding vows – in her Halloween costume disguised as the Heck Of A Guy website.
_____________________
Frank Sinatra’s “precious few” are, in this case, equivalent to “two.” [↩]
One who speaks of himself or herself in the third person is, it turns out, an illeist, according to the inevitably reliable Anu Garg at words-at-wordsmith.org. DrHGuy is fascinated by this discovery and hopes you are as well. [↩]
Any popularity poll based on 1HeckOfAGuy.com web stats for the past few days would show Leonard Cohen a distant second to a vegetable and a tale from the Ozarks.
This time of year, visitors to this site are seeking carved pumpkins and stories abut inexplicable lights appearing on country roads rather than Canadian singer-songwriters.
Consequently, this seems an apt day for the
Annual Heck Of A Guy Halloween Hullabaloo
The Spooklight Story
The saga of DrHGuy’s up close and personal encounter with the Ozarks Spooklight (also spelled “Spook Light”) is not technically linked to Halloween, but it is – well, spooky, and that seems close enough.
The following excerpt provides a sense of the (absolutely true) story:
It was at this time that our conviction that we understood how the world operated in general, along with our beliefs in specific scientific principles, dissolved in the acute, undiluted fear of impending doom.
The seasonal ascendancy of pumpkins, squash, and gourds does not mean Leonard “The Icon” Cohen is absent from holiday happenings in these parts. There is, for example, the haunting tale of …
The Lost Leonard Cohen Album – Songs Of Love & Halloween
Excerpts:
Disappointed with the sales of Leonard Cohen’s first two albums, Songs of Leonard Cohen and Songs From a Room, his record label demanded that he produce a novelty LP tied to Halloween to increase his commercial appeal. His protests that issuing an album in this genre would be incongruent with his style were countered by the corporation’s argument that “no one is buying the poet turned singer-songwriter shtick.” …
Leonard Cohen and his record company have consistently denied the existence of Songs of Love and Halloween, but to this day, those passing by a certain Montreal warehouse near the harbor after sunset on October 31st report hearing a low-pitched, gravelly voice singing – or wailing – about the woman who “… cut off my head on the unmade bed”
Cohen’s own reference to masks in “I’m Your Man” is well known:
If you want a lover
I’ll do anything you ask me to
And if you want another kind of love
I’ll wear a mask for you
Few, however, realize that this offer to wear a mask evolved from an actual episode from Cohen’s ownl life. The phrase originated from Cohen’s initially reluctant acquiescence to Marianne’s insistence that the two of them attend a costume party their neighbors on Hydra were hosting. At first, Cohen refused. Later he offered a compromise; he would attend but would not wear a costume. Finally, he succumbed to Marrianne’s continued entreaties, testily muttering “All right, I’ll wear a mask – for you. Just shut up about it.”
Conventional wisdom has it that Cohen arrived at the party dressed as a 75 year old boxer-physician with a penchant for extraordinarily thorough physical exams.
Last year, Adrian du Plessis, Personable Manager of Allison Crowe,1 uploaded a seasonally appropriate tune from Heck Of A Guy’s favorite Icon-in-training. While the content of the video presentation spotlighting the talents of Ms Crowe, who seems to have been born with the gift of a gorgeous voice, is replete with Halloween imagery, it is Adrian’s pun-laden YouTube description (pasted below) that is truly scary .
A song in the key of Hallowe’en, a favourite holiday for musician Allison Crowe. Playing piano since age five and singing, almost as long, Crowe, inspired by Ani DiFranco and Loreena McKennitt, materialized her own record label in 2003. She’s now brewing her seventh album/CD, “Spiral”.
You could say Crowe is very ghoul-oriented.
“Allison Chains” (voice, piano) is linked to this track for eternity, with Dave “The Damned” Baird (bass), and Laurent “The Butcher” Boucher (percussion). This version is heard on “This Little Bird”, a CD for which Billie “The Wicca” Woods shot the cover. (Woods’ many portraits are fit to be hung in gallowries worldwide.)
Keeping an eye on all things newt, let us toast those musicians from the Netherlands to America, ‘cross Canada, en France and beyond – who’ve covered this song, including: Dhenzy, Victoria Venom, Lucresa, the friend of “dudelookslikealady2″, Natouchka38, Briauna Marijuana, and Eilish (estarhart).
From the brain of Logan Anschell comes just the right interjection – for those about to enjoy this musical treat. It’s the same thing, he whispers, a skeleton says to a vampire at dinner time:
“Bone appétit!”
May this raise your spirits ( :
Skeletons and Spirits ~ Allison Crowe (Happy Halloween)
Those Incredible Pumpkin-carvings
Halloween Pumpkins 2007
During the short existence of Heck Of A Guy, we’ve been privileged to showcase some spectacular examples of traditional, artistic, and just plain bizarre pumpkin-carving.
When the calendar shows only one shopping day left until DrHGuy’s birthday, Heck Of A Guy traditionally offers readers a Halloween distraction to bind the anxiety generated by the anticipation of tomorrow’s double holiday: All Saints Day and DrHGuy’s natal celebration.1 If you’ve already purchased and wrapped your birthday gift, feel free to indulge in this year’s Heck Of A Guy Halloween Hodgepodge, starring Leonard Cohen, Allison Crowe, and the most twisted Jack-o’-lanterns you’re likely to come across.
The Leonard Cohen Mask
If you want a lover
I’ll do anything you ask me to
And if you want another kind of love
I’ll wear a mask for you
Halloween jack-o’-lantern carved by Leonard Cohen, 1994. From LeonardCohenFiles
The Lost Leonard Cohen Album – Songs Of Love & Halloween
Excerpt:
Leonard Cohen and his record company have consistently denied the existence of Songs of Love and Halloween, but to this day, those passing by a certain Montreal warehouse near the harbor after sunset on October 31st report hearing a low-pitched, gravelly voice singing – or wailing – about the woman who “… cut off my head on the unmade bed”
Adrian du Plessis, Manager of Allison Crowe Music, has uploaded a season-appropriate tune from Allison Crowe, currently working on a new album, Spiral. The YouTube description is itself replete with horrifying puns. Consider yourselves warned.
A song in the key of Hallowe’en, a favourite holiday for musician Allison Crowe. Playing piano since age five and singing, almost as long, Crowe, inspired by Ani DiFranco and Loreena McKennitt, materialized her own record label in 2003. She’s now brewing her seventh album/CD, “Spiral”.
You could say Crowe is very ghoul-oriented.
“Allison Chains” (voice, piano) is linked to this track for eternity, with Dave “The Damned” Baird (bass), and Laurent “The Butcher” Boucher (percussion). This version is heard on “This Little Bird”, a CD for which Billie “The Wicca” Woods shot the cover. (Woods’ many portraits are fit to be hung in gallowries worldwide.)
Keeping an eye on all things newt, let us toast those musicians from the Netherlands to America, ‘cross Canada, en France and beyond – who’ve covered this song, including: Dhenzy, Victoria Venom, Lucresa, the friend of “dudelookslikealady2″, Natouchka38, Briauna Marijuana, and Eilish (estarhart).
From the brain of Logan Anschell comes just the right interjection – for those about to enjoy this musical treat. It’s the same thing, he whispers, a skeleton says to a vampire at dinner time:
“Bone appétit!”
May this raise your spirits ( :
Skeletons and Spirits ~ Allison Crowe (Happy Halloween)
Those Incredible Pumpkin-carvings
Halloween Pumpkins 2007
During the short existence of Heck Of A Guy, we’ve been privileged to showcase some spectacular examples of traditional, artistic, and just plain bizarre pumpkin-carving.
One who speaks of himself or herself in the third person is, it turns out, an illeist, according to the inevitably reliable Anu Garg at words-at-wordsmith.org. DrHGuy is fascinated by this discovery and hopes you are as well. [↩]
Leonard Cohen’s Record Company And Other Scary Things
More Leonard Cohen Info Not Found On Other Web Sites1
Disappointed with the sales of Leonard Cohen’s first two albums, Songs of Leonard Cohen and Songs From a Room, his record label demanded that he produce a novelty LP tied to Halloween to increase his commercial appeal. His protests that issuing an album in this genre would be incongruent with his style were countered by the corporation’s argument that “no one is buying the poet turned singer-songwriter shtick.”
The result was Songs of Love and Halloween, a collection of tracks, including Nightmare On Boogie Street, Hey, That’s No Way To Say Trick Or Treat, Monster Mash Me To The End Of Love, Tacoma Trailer Park Murders, and Bates Motel #2, the recording company executives were to finally judge “too depressing for Halloween,” leading them to cancel distribution of the already pressed album.
Songs of Love and Hate, rather than Songs of Love And Halloween, eventually became the third Cohen album.
The songs themselves, with new titles and minor modifications of the lyrics, formed the nucleus of Cohen’s repertoire over the course of his career.
Songs of Love and Halloween – The Afterlife
Leonard Cohen and his record company have consistently denied the existence of Songs of Love and Halloween, but to this day, those passing by a certain Montreal warehouse near the harbor after sunset on October 31st report hearing a low-pitched, gravelly voice singing – or wailing – about the woman who “… cut off my head on the unmade bed”
Yesterday’s post deservedly praised Extreme Pumpkins as the Heck Of A Guy’s favorite gourd decoration site. DrHGuy is, however, remiss in slighting other pumpkin-centric sites by not explaining the basis on which Extreme Pumpkins has been repeatedly selected as The Heck Of A Guy #1 Pumpkin Carving Site.
It is a sad fact that DrHGuy is artistically challenged. In elementary school, the announcement of an art session, greeted by fellow students with anticipatory glee nigh onto rapture, struck terror into the then tender and vulnerable soul of the young DrHGuy.
Consequently, the design motif at Extreme Pumpkins, which emphasizes clever ideas manifest in simple designs rather than intricate images requiring significant artistic talent, is especially appealing to one who has too often heard the query, “What is that supposed to be?”
When the chief feature of a carved pumpkin is, for example, a 3 foot flame shooting out the top, a botched eyelid or an erratically cut mouth tend to attract little criticism.
DrHGuy is not, however, devoid of admiration for those talent-enriched pumpkin carvings.
He is, for example, in awe of the phenomenal 3-D productions of Ray Villafane at Villafane Studio Pumpkins
Ray Villafane Predator Pumpkin
For the edification of Heck Of A Guy viewers, several examples of outstanding pumpkin art (and a Dry-Ice Martini and Electric Cake that is pumpkin-free but certainly resonates with Halloween) were posted yesterday at DrHGuy.
The simplest means of viewing these is to go to DrHGuy and scroll back through the posts dated 29 October 2008. For those insistent on using links to individual posts, those connections follow:
The events of Leonard Cohen's life and career are marked on a timeline accompanied by audio and video recordings of Cohen's songs and poems as well as links to more information.
Do I Have To Dance All Night Surpasses 70,000 Views
"Do I Have To Dance All Night" was performed many times in concerts but was never released in the US.
As part of my crusade to popularize this song, I've cobbled together 2 videos - one for the semi-funky 1976 version with Laura Branigan and one for the 1980 more gypsy, less disco version - that kinda sorta fit the music.
As of Dec 19, 2012, the video of the 1976 version of Do I Have To Dance All Night has been viewed 70,152 times.
Heck Of A Guy offers 3 videos of clips and photos from The Leonard Cohen World Tour:
1. The Original Heck Of A Guy Dear Leonard Cohen - Thanks For The Tour. I Hope It Was Good For You, Too. Video Celebration Of The First 14 Months Of The 2008-2009 World Tour can be viewed at Thanks For The Tour
The Cohen Fandemic
Endemic for decades in areas such as Canada, Norway, Poland, and France, Leonard Cohen Fan Syndrome has become a world-wide epidemic in the past 2 years, spread by the Leonard Cohen World Tour and abetted by proselyting carriers despite efforts by authorities to quarantine these individuals at LeonardCohenForum.
Diagnostic Criteria
Based on the observations of DrHGuy, standardized criteria for the pertinent Axis II diagnosis are now available at
Danger Signs
In addition to the formal medical description of this diagnosis, Heck Of A Guy has also compiled a list of the aberrant behaviors which indicate one is at high risk for being a full-fledged fan of Leonard Cohen. These signs and symptoms can be found at
Leonard Cohen’s Elegy For Janis Joplin – Chelsea Hotel #1
This video features the first version of the song Leonard Cohen would later revise into "Chelsea Hotel #2" along with images of Leonard Cohen, Janis Joplin - whose liaison with Cohen at the Chelsea Hotel led to the creation of the song, the Hotel itself, and other associated people & places.
Special Compilation Video – A Thousand Kisses Deep
This composite of Leonard Cohen’s recitations of “A Thousand Kisses Deep” over the years is accompanied by a video montage of drawings by and photos of the Canadian singer-songwriter.
Video – Leonard Cohen Recites “God Is Alive, Magic Is Afoot”
Leonard Cohen recites the "God Is Alive; Magic Is Afoot" passage from "Beautiful Losers" which was later popularized by Buffy Sainte-Marie. Cohen's performance took place in 1967.
Heck Of A Guy offers, with assistance from Randy Newman and Etta James, the writer and performer, respectively, of "You Can Leave Your Hat On," a look at Leonard Cohen As Hunk.
Photos of or related to Leonard Cohen that fall into specific themes have been among the ongoing features at DrHGuy, HOAG's sibling site. Galleries displaying collected images of 3 of these themes are now available at
Winter Lady – The Joni Mitchell & Leonard Cohen Versions
In 1966 Joni Mitchell wrote and sang a song called "Winter Lady." In 1967, the year Mitchell and Cohen had their romantic fling, Leonard Cohen wrote and sang a different song that was also called "Winter Lady."
A comparison of these 2 songs as well as a video that includes each artist performing his or her version of "Winter Lady" can be found at
Over 35 tunes performed by Dylan, Janis Joplin, Ray Charles, Elvis Presley, Patsy Cline, Otis Redding, Chuck Berry, The Platters, Joni Mitchell, George Jones, Roy Orbison, Elvis Presley, Jay-Z, and other musicians.
Read what Cohen said about them and listen to the music at
Photos, Videos, & More
See photos of Leonard Cohen's arrival in Oviedo, the opening of Leonard Cohen: The B-Side - Drawings And Engravings Of A Multidisciplinary Artist, his speech and press conference, his tribute conference, the lost and found Famous Blue Sharpie, and more at:
Note: Almost all HeckOfAGuy and DrHGuy posts contain different content.
And We’re Still Making Love In My Secret Life – Julie’s Story & Video
... I never had a chance. I was - and this is the only word that fits - smitten. I still am.
She was smart and quick-witted, although it would take me 3 years to recognize that she was, in fact, much smarter than me, and then another 2 years to forgive her for that. She was also good-looking and unabashedly sexy.
And, we fell madly, irredeemably, unflinchingly in love.
Complementing the unlikely story of how Julie and I met, fell in love, and - 9 years, 2 husbands, 1 wife, and 2 careers later - got together to spend an outrageously wonderful 20 years together before her death, a video, set to the poignant "In My Secret Life" by Leonard Cohen and Sharon Robinson, is now available that evokes the role Julie, who died 10 years ago, continues to play in my life.
The written account of the story (think When Harry Met Sally meets Waiting For Godot) starts, appropriately, at This Is How A Love Story Began
Clicking on Taste of LC - Heck Of A Guy and Taste of LC - DrHGuy finds posts from those sites that feature Leonard Cohen's choices in furniture, clothing (including suits, fedoras, caps, berets, other hats, boots and other footwear, swimsuits, and in at least one case cut-offs), art, jewelry, food, books, magazines, alcohol, tobacco, firearms, ... - all of which offer a different perspective on Leonard Cohen.
This Heck Of A Guy compilation includes unreleased Leonard Cohen performances over a 30+ year period.
Track List: Vol 1
1. Feels So Good (The Other Blues Song)
2. Book Of Longing
3. The Darkness
4. Puppets
5. Lullaby
6. Do I Have to Dance All Night (1976)
7. Blues By The Jews
Track List: Vol 2
1. Red River Valley
2. Never Got To Love You (Duet with Anjani)
3. Can't Help Falling In Love
4. Ride Around
5. The Union Makes Us Strong
6. We Shall Not Be Moved
7. To Love Somebody
8. The Hypnotist (Poem)
9. Chelsea Hotel #1
10. There's No Reason Why You Should Remember Me
11. Streets Of Laredo
12. Do I Have To Dance All Night (1980)
Now, Another Other Leonard Cohen Album, the second collection of unreleased Leonard Cohen songs joins the popular The Other Leonard Cohen Album to offer fans of the iconic singer-songwriter a total of 3 CDs of musical treats. Another Other Leonard Cohen Album includes the following tracks plus liner notes by Sylvie Simmons.
1. Je Veux Vivre Tout Seul
2. Kevin Barry
3. Die Gedanken Sind Frei
4. Store Room
5. As Time Goes By
6. Don’t Go Home with Your Hard-on
7. Blessed is the Memory
8. Silent Night
9. Dead Song
10. Another Saturday Night
11. Ballad of the Absent Mare
12. Guerrero
13. The Butcher
14. Un As Der Rebbe Singt
15. Song to the Machines
16. If It Be Your Will
17. Thirsty for the Kiss
18. A Thousand Kisses Deep
19. I Tried To Leave You
20. Whither Thou Goest
21. Mr Cohen Must Be Going
Heck Of A Guy celebrates Leonard Cohen’s 77th birthday (September 21, 2011) with a video of scenes from Leonard Cohen’s life and photos of fans expressing their affection for Mr. Cohen, all set to “I Love Leonard Cohen” by Robin Grey.
Leonard Cohen At 75 Viewed Over 15,000 Times: a video montage of favorite scenes featuring the singer-songwriter, poet, and icon set to "They Can't Take That Away From Me."
Video – Jennifer Warnes’ Way Down Deep & Leonard Cohen’s A Thousand Kisses Deep
The video begins with Jennifer Warnes singing the gorgeous but routinely overlooked "Way Down Deep," which is followed by Leonard Cohen's recitation of "A Thousand Kisses Deep" in Dublin to juxtapose the earliest performed precursor of Cohen's now classic "A Thousand Kisses Deep" with the most recent version.
Joni Mitchell and Leonard Cohen had a fling in the 1960s that, for unspecified reasons, was short-lived, with Cohen instigating the parting.
It was then and is now a complex connection. In 1988, Cohen said, I'm still very friendly with Joni - I had dinner with her before the tour, and I have the same admiration for her as you do. But I think it was Noel Harrison who came up to me in the LA Troubadour and said "How do you like living with Beethoven?"
That's right - the entire 2008-2010 Leonard Cohen World Tour, including the events that triggered the Tour, have been compressed into one 60 second video.
More realistically, as can be seen in this photo from the September 1994 Mojo article by John Walsh (which identifies her as Leonard’s “Romanian friend”), the poster child for this campaign is reduced to slouching resignedly on the one bed in the house and enduring the ignominy that is shag carpet.
