The Background
The third selection from the Leonard Cohen 75th Birthday Registry1 not only extends Mr. Cohen’s career options but could literally be a lifesaver for anyone who takes him up on his offer in “I’m Your Man:”
And if you want a doctor
I’ll examine every inch of you
In “I’m Your Man,” of course, Mr. Cohen lists several personas other than physician he is willing to assume (e.g., boxer, lover, driver, mask-wearer). While anyone celebrating his 75th birthday might be well advised to consider the wisdom of participating in boxing, none of those roles – except that of physician – would likely put anyone at risk other than Cohen himself.
Although the potential for physical harm from the proposed examination, however thorough it might be,2 seems slight, performing an appendectomy, for example, might lead to problems. And, there is the matter of legal liability involved for holding oneself out to be a licensed medical doctor.
Given those potential risks and Mr. Cohen’s imminent need for a new avocation with the end of the World Tour this fall, what better birthday present could one give than a Harvard medical degree? If he gets started right away, he could be celebrating his 80th birthday as Leonard Cohen, MD.
Medical Education Cost
From Harvard Medical School Costs
Harvard Medical School tuition rates are reset annually and cover courses taken from August 1 through June 30 each year up to the final year of enrollment ending with graduation. Tuition is billed by semester. Two forms of term bill payment are available: payment in full by semester or monthly payments (payments for the year are spread over eight months). The monthly payment plan carries a service charge of $35 per semester.
An estimate of yearly expenses shows that the average cost for an unmarried first-year student will be approximately $66,600 for the 10.5-month academic year 2009-2010. This estimate includes tuition, health service fee and insurance premium, room and board, books, travel, transportation to clinical sites, laundry, and incidentals. Students whose homes are outside the northeast region of the United States may experience travel costs beyond the scope of this estimate.
Students who opt for the 5-year program or whose time for meeting degree requirements at Harvard Medical School exceeds eight semesters and who have paid eight semesters of full tuition will be assessed a reduced tuition charge for each semester of enrollment beyond the eighth. This reduced tuition is expected to be $2,450 per semester in 2009-2010.
Tuition and Fees for a First Year Student are as follows:
| 2009-2010 | |
| Tuition | $42,500 |
| Univ. Health Services Fee |
$1,126 |
| Blue Cross / Blue Shield |
$1,714 |
| Disability Insurance | $63 |
| Matriculation Fee | $35 |
| Educational Materials Fee | $395 |
| Vanderbilt Hall (avg. rent) |
$7,680 |
| Other living expenses (including travel, living expenses and transportation) | $10,210 |
- To aid fans in selecting gifts to celebrate Leonard Cohen’s 75th birthday September 21, 2009, Heck Of A Guy has opened the Leonard Cohen Birthday Gift Service and Registry, offering advice and assistance in choosing that just right birthday present, whatever ones budget or Cohenist preferences (e.g., early Cohen, post-1979 Cohen, “everything except Death Of A Ladies’ Man,” etc.). For the complete story, see The Leonard Cohen 75th Birthday Gift Registry [↩]
- The gambit of proffering an extremely meticulous medical examination on a member of the opposite sex is an idea that has occurred to others (i.e., every male medical student DrHGuy has ever known) as well as Leonard Cohen. [↩]





The essential step in the lab exercise was inducing encephalitis in a number of rodents by the simple expedient of injecting their brains with Semliki Forest virus.









































